Datta completes full length novel, sends Jonathan Stroud into a state of shock

In a startling development today evening, Datta completed his first actual full length novel in over 12 years, sending ripples of shock throughout the college. It is a well known fact that his previous completed reading, with the single exception of Workshop Practice by Hajra Choudhary, was of Snow White and the Seven Drawfs. According to popular legend, an eight year old Datta,, looking as dark as he is now, completed this book (for the want of a better word) in twenty sittings, reading as many as fifty words each time. Ever since then, he has not attempted to read any other piece of writing that is non academic in nature, always saying, "I am waiting for the movie". It is known that he has been waiting, patiently and dutifully, for movie versions of several masterpieces like The Metamorphosis, The Alchemist, The Old Man and the Sea (which is unfortunately not about Thatha's misadventures at St.Mary's Island but the more famous book by Hemimgway) and The Bible. It is understandable that during this futile wait he resorted to watching colourful telugu movies, and their original tamil versions starring Rajinikanth for as many as forty times, growing into an expert in delivering badly articulated Tamil punch dialogues.

The book that he finished today was not, as many of you are expecting, Tales of Beedle the Bard by J K Rowling. Though it would be much closer to his previous literary conquets, it somehow escaped Datta's eye (understandable, given its size). The book that he did read was Jonathan Stroud's The Amulet of Samarkand, a humour fantasy book, disproving the popular belief that Datta has no sense of humour. (However a school of thought still exits that a sense of humour is the only sense that Datta has, but these have been vehemently denied by him, "I have sixth sense also; a proper dvdrip of it, that too!"). Some reactions to this news:

"Jonathan Stroud should be so proud! Lol..That rhymes! I am so funny", said Gay Chinese and 'Civil' Rights (GCG) spokesperson Adi, collapsing into a fit of mad giggles.
"Nonsense! I expect he read only the footnotes and then claims that he has read the whole book. Btw the footnotes rock! They are the best part of the book. Especially the...blah..blah..blah", said Anish Vijay, well known actors-face-recognition-database expert.
"Oh my GOD !" was local punk/'hotshot' Puts' only response to this news following which he went into the Avatar state scaring away everyone in a 1 km radius around him.
"Oh MY God!" was NV's response, followed by "Shit! Someone beat me to Go*d it! Again!" muttered under his breath.
"300m!" was the Resident Mad Scientist Gubaldo's reaction to no-one-knows-what-or-wants-to. He was last seen wandering in the corridor trying to change his hairstyle and calculate where lightning struck (or was it the value of one knot?) at the same time...not something that you would want people with a weak heart condition to see.
"Whats the big deal rey? You know what Kau said the other day.....", said aged resident no good Thatha, relapsing into his usual way of completing sentences (in the last decade, that is).
"Dude, thats mind-fucking news man!", drawled Ankit using his favorite (and allegedly only) adjective in his vocabulary. "Btw did I miss any exams when I was asleep?"
"Oiii..Oiii..Oiii..Oiii" said local fat ass Bk dispalying his extraodinary lung power and permanently deafening two dogs in Surathkal.
"Dude you dont really have to do any work to claim you are a 'working' member of a club, man", Ponky said, wrongly inferring that the question was about his claims of being a working member of Jaagaran and Genesis, and displaying his extraodinary reasoning skills that won him the debating competition during Crrescendo last year.
Vattal was unavailable for comment as he was busy building bots that could give him proxy during classes. (The writer already has such a bot; it even has a name- Gubaldo)